Sunday, September 8, 2013
Sitting here by myself bored. My man left right after I got home from work, and the kids are sleeping. I have no friends, I have acquaintances, people I know. I don't know them good enough to hang out with them. Just people I work with. I have a hard time making friends. I have a hard time opening up and letting people get to know me. I've been like this for a while. When I was younger in my pre-teens and teens, yea I had a few friends that I hung with. As I turned towards the drug life I grew away from them. Now I know people but I don't know them. I really wish I could be more social and have the ability to go up and start a conversation.Or just say hey you want to hang out. Most people aren't doing the things I am doing> I don't really drink and if I do it is to get fucked up and have the head change. Most normal people don't use drugs. Marijuana not be counted. That is not a drug to me, its medical.If i do go somewhere I have totake my kids with me. Taking them somewhere is hard. My youngest cries, and my two older ones fight and nit pick each other. I hope it gets better with them as they get older.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Hi , Sounds like we got a lot in common . . . two elder boys that nit-pick each other and a younger girl that cries. All that with addiction mixed in (mines Heroin, but it's all addiction), Though my youngest is six now and it don't seem to get an easier . . Maybe harder. I thought I would be clean by now (14 yrs using H)but everyday I feed myself empty promises with my "last" bag!
ReplyDeleteBeing hassled by youngest now to get off laptop and play, I'm sure you can relate to that.
Look forward to reading more of your Blog, I got no friends either. My low point n each day s picking girl up from school in a playground full of judgemental mothers, arseholes! I know I need to change but feel pretty stuck.
Anyway, gotta go, take care and hope today is easy for you and me both x
"Head change" :) that's what eye say to myself when the shot decides to kick in.
ReplyDeleteEye can totally relate to the asocial thing, although eye care about it a lot less than eye ever have. Still at times, miss those close connections eye had in m'eye early to mid 20's. After that eye guess you're supposed to have a family or get involved in a career, meet people that way... But eye can't relate to eye guess the "adult" world or whatever. So little in common, so much eye can't say.